I’ve been a specialist in extended bondage sessions for over 20 years and in that time have had so many incredible experiences and wonderful feedback from my submissives. For most of them being totally restricted and under my control is both exciting and deeply relaxing.
Over the months since lockdown lifted I have observed an increase in these sessions and quite a number of new (to me) submissives reaching out for this type of experience. And to be honest it’s not surprising…
For the past two or three years our minds have been constantly stressed and anxious, spinning like a mouse running in a wheel and never able to relax. Sensory deprivation and restrictive bondage is like taking the mouse out of the rush and the glare and putting him in a dark, comfy little nest.
You can sometimes achieve this in shorter 2 or 3 hour sessions, but it’s when the duration extends and the clock loses meaning that the experience really changes. A sub of mine who recently transitioned from 3 hour sessions to day length (around 8 hours) told me that previously he felt like as soon as he was fully restrained he’d be moved to a new position – but with durational bondage he was able to fully relish and enjoy each experience without feeling rushed.
I asked my Twitter followers what is it about restraint that makes them so happy and these were some of the answers…
Sissy G – Letting go from this world and being restricted and retrained just makes me happy
Kaiju, Monstrous Puppy – It strips away worldly needs & obligations I know what space I’m in, what movement & senses are available to me, and that’s it, I don’t need to be anything else There’s also overcoming internal struggles about needing to be in control of a situation, and giving up that control
Curious x10 (they/her) – I think the main joys for me are: 1) the compression makes me feel happy, like a wonderful long-lasting full body hug 2) being restrained means I can’t do anything and is mentally relaxing because I normally feel I should always be doing something. There is sometimes also a vulnerability aspect that is enjoyable, but that isn’t constant. Sometimes my wife will sleepsack me for a while and just read next to me if she thinks I’m stressed out.
My personal style of bondage is usually both quite comfortable and extremely restrictive which is why I favour the layering of leather, metal and device bondage materials with the addition of rope rather than rope by itself. In durational positions I love to keep coming back and adding more levels of restriction plus often other torments to highlight the slave’s helplessness… A change of position occurs because I have decided on it rather than the sub needing to safeword because the bondage has become too painful or risky in terms of restricted blood flow or nerve compression.
The following is from a slave I have been seeing for regular multi-day sessions over many years who answered my question in an email…
I (then) seem to go into a sort of substate where I accept and manage my situation and relax further, a sort of hypnotic state. I feel totally under your control, I don’t think of anything outside of the present situation and am totally focussed on you and what you are doing. I also seem to become super focussed on your presence, touch, and movement. I generally don’t hear any other sound except your voice or other sounds associated with you. My senses are also heightened to any other torment you may use, particularly Tens or electrical play.
I have no concept of time and begin to accept I will be in this position for a considerable time or until you decide otherwise. If you leave me alone for a while, I slip further into a trance like state and I think I have sometimes dozed off. I become and feel very comfortable, warm, safe, and secure. I have told you that I go through phases of my brain wishing you would return to release me or ease any discomfort. It is strange to think this, knowing that your presence usually results in further torment, which interrupts my control process or comfortable situation, and returns me to being aware that I am still your slave and subject to anything you want to happen or enjoy.
I find that my visits to you and being controlled and not having to make any decisions gives me a mental holiday. I always felt refreshed. mentally. Your durational bondage is part of that. I always feel destressed and happy after long sessions of absolute control.
In some ways it’s hard to explain exactly why I get so much satisfaction from creating these experiences. It’s a different type of gratification than the immediate sadistic energy transfer of corporal punishment for example. But creating a moment and space in which someone can totally surrender and feel absolutely safe is incredibly rewarding to me. I can clearly see the difference in someone’s face, posture and overall energy afterwards and know that even if the mouse has to return to his wheel again he carries the deep body memory of being helpless but completely protected under my control.
